life-news-awareness-2.15.22-deservingvsdesperate

Hey ,

Have a seat.And please know as I tell you this dark, embarrassing, smart-me, stupid moment story, boy do I wish I could tell you it was the first time it ever happened to me during my entire online dating life, but it’s not so.I also wish I could just blame the dating sites, hu-meh-nity at large, and my naïveté EXCEPT, if you knew 1) high powered, in-your-face executive life coach-me, you’d know it was a crock, and 2) that’s not how we roll at HG and Inner.U.We’re always on the lookout for our own dark side/lower self, our spiritual lessons, our run amok-ing traits, our integrity breaches, and our fingerprints on our own life’s crime scene (our felony, or better yet, fella-ny). After my last break up with a sweet, not-my-man man, my goal this round on the dating sites was to find someone equal to me.Not bigger, not better: equal.I’m Co-Founder and Managing Partner of a renowned executive life coaching company. I change peoples lives on a dime.Enough was enough.No more selling out,Settling for sweet but slow moving,Successful but slippery,Great looking but sports obsessed.I wanted a KING.So, there I was, back on the sites. This part, the hunt, as much as many of you understandably dread, I don’t hate.I’m good at it.If given a task, no matter the task, I’m diligent.Obsessed to get it right, even.After a couple of months of no’s and meh-bes, it happened:I met a viable contender, a fifth-generation Rockefeller, no less.Now we’re talking. I Googled him, and what he told me matched up.We started flirting and talking on the phone. We set up a FaceTime. Oddly, he missed our call.I told my coach and sister, Lauren, about what transpired. She gave him a "no pass". I agreed, these were clear online dating red flags. He was clearly not my match. I told him via text. Blocked him. Onward. Yay. No selling out.Until...A day or so later, he found me on WhatsApp, apologized cutely, profusely, and romantically, and asked for another shot.I, without telling my sister (SEE: UH OH #1), gave him one more shot. We FaceTimed and had a blast. I was so excited. He was not only a Rockefeller, he was crazy good looking.So we set up a date for Saturday night. I told Lauren everything. Except, OK, maybe, I told her via email (so what if I know she rarely, if ever, reads her emails) about the fact that on our first FaceTime he showed up without a shirt (SEE: UH OH #2-4).Come to think of it, I didn't tell anyone else that fact (SEE: UH OH #5). It seems that my lower self loves a good, hot, wealthy NOT-IT and was already unconsciously gaming this, stepping over the online dating red flags, and keeping him at all costs.Even though, no sh*t, without question, I would have told YOU to Run Forrest Run. FAST.An hour before our Saturday night date, he called me from outside the courthouse...

TRUEly Yours,Beth Handel